"It looks as if Hollywood brides keep the bouquets and throw away the grooms."

  • "You have 19 children???"

  • "I love my husband"

  • "Lady, I love my cigar, too, but I take it out once in a while."

  • "A hermit eh? Then why's your table set for four?"

  • "That's nothing. My alarm clock is set for eight."

  • "You know, I'd buy you a parachute if I knew it wouldn't open."

  • "Haha you're crazy, I got a pair of shoes."

A man's only as old as the woman he feels

Behind every successful man is a woman, behind her is his wife.

From the moment I picked your book up until I laid it down I was convulsed with laughter. Someday I intend reading it.

I have nothing but respect for you, and not much of that.

Oh, are you from Wales? Do you know a fella named Jonah? He used to live in whales for a while.

Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.

Groucho Marx - 02.10.1890 - 19.08.1977

(Zugabe von Chico)